I am so happy to introduce you to my soon-to-be-friend-in-real-life, Katy Lindsey. Katy contacted me a few months ago to come speak at her church in New Mexico and I will be doing that sooooo soon! But as we talked about her heart for the women of her church and my heart for the women in our community, we discovered such a kindred spirit! Y'all will be so encouraged by her faith today.
Katy! Tell us a bit about yourself.
Hi I am Katy Lindsey, I am 38, wife to Jason Lindsey, mother to the cutest three mixed children my eyes did ever see, yes every mother is biased, ok?
I am kindergarten teacher, a Sunday school teacher, mentor, friend, daughter, older sister, praise and worship singer, but my favorite way to describe who I am is: a child of God. I was born and raised in Mexico. Yes, I love tacos. Tacos are life. I will fight anyone who says otherwise.
One of the greatest experiences of my early 20's was to get involved in a ministry called Campus Crusade for Christ. I learned about the importance to do life in community, accountability and mentorship. I met my sweetheart on a mission trip we both had signed up for. This was the culmination of his year commitment to work as a missionary with college students in Guadalajara, Mx. I honestly thought I would never see this boy again, but I am so glad I was wrong.
I have a passion for teaching, whether it is reading to 5-6 year olds, to anything that the Lord has poured into me. In the past seven years the Lord has taught me so much about healing childhood trauma and mother and father wounds. I feel He has been planting in my heart the desire to study more about this and help other women to live in His true freedom, just like He's shown me I could live.
Alright, girl! Let's get down to it. Share a little bit about a time you had to choose to believe God.
As a girl that was raised by a mother that was emotionally abused, she was, too emotionally unavailable and don't think she ever had a clue of how much this damaged her and me. I also grew up with a daddy that was physically present but was never emotionally present. I am almost 40 years old and I can finally understand that this had more to do with them, sin and generational trauma than it ever did with me. I have chosen forgiveness, compassion and understanding now, but it wasn't like this for a very long time.
I do not need to go into great detail to tell you this, but there are multiple studies that show what the absence of a father&mother (whether it is physical or emotional) do to a child. I was emotionally unhealthy and wounded. I lived many years being a control freak because it was the only way I could feel safe. I threw myself in the arms of anyone or anything that had the appearance of the love and approval I so desperately needed and wanted from my parents.
I spent most of early twenties making poor choices and unequivocal mistakes in regard to my sexual purity. I got married a few years later thinking this would "fix me", but it only enhanced what was already there. I engaged in an emotional affair early on in my marriage, believe me, this is not the testimony sentence I wanted, but t is, it is never easy to say it, but I am no longer afraid what people will think of me when I already have the acceptance of the only One whose opinion matters. The shame and guilt from this affair left me feeling unworthy, unfixable and broken beyond repair.
I had done it, you guys! I had outdone God's grace, plus I had hurt the person I vowed to love for as long as I lived. I started to believe the enemy's lies and was ready to walk away from all things faith and from my marriage. I was so lost, confused and carried so much pain I never knew I could live any other way.
I will spare you the details but I told you I was ready to walk away from this boy that stole my heart on a mission trip. Jason and I decided to separate almost against his will. I am so thankful He was willing to give me space even if he didn't want to, because it was during this time that the love, mercy and grace of the Father covered me so deeply and profoundly, I have never looked back.
I had a crucial decision to make. I would believe what the enemy had been feeding me or I had to take God at his word.
I had to dare to believe that God was someone I could trust.
I had to dare to believe that even when things felt out of control, He was in control.
I had to dare to believe that He would not use me and throw me like garbage when he didn't need me anymore.
I had to dare to believe He would not condemn me every time I messed up.
I dared to believe that God was a safe person, and that I would always be loved, accepted and secured. I chose obedience even when I knew that the journey we were about to embark was not easy. I had to believe that God was the restorer, and He would complete the good work he started in us.
I am so thankful at that point Jason chose obedience as well. He chose to stay even when he had all the reasons to have an out. Boy, I made terrible mistakes all my life, but I know marrying Jason Lindsey was one of the best decisions I have ever made.
The road to restoration has not been an easy one, we have had to deal the consequences of my past sins, we have had to invest in numerous counseling sessions, we have shed many tears, sweat, and prayed lots and lots of prayers. We know that all stories don't end up like ours, but hear me out, friends!
This we know: that God has been faithful to us, delivered us, rescued us, healed us, restored us, sustained us, sanctified and covered us and a whole multitude of sins. To this day we are still covered by the one Whose love never fails, and will continue believing who He says He is and what He can do when we chose to obey him.
Whatever you may be wrestling with today, friend, would you dare to believe HIM that he is bigger than that same thing?
"For I am sure of this very thing that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Jesus Christ" Philippians 4:16